A theory of type matching in romantic relationships

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Argy-Bargy
Posts: 4
Joined: Sun Dec 07, 2014 1:01 pm
MBTI type: INTP
Gender (M or F): M

A theory of type matching in romantic relationships

Post by Argy-Bargy » Sun Dec 07, 2014 2:41 pm

There are several "theories" about what types are best matched in romantic relationships. I derived the following "theory" using the research findings described in the following video. I don't necessarily agree with these ideas, but I put it out for your consideration.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYfoGTI ... mU&index=2

Helen Fisher studied the brain chemistry of love and attraction and found that there are four "brain systems" based on four chemicals, each linked to a "constellation" of personality traits. The chemicals are dopamine, serotonin, estrogen, and testosterone. Dopamine is associated with sensation seeking, and people whose brain activity is dominated by this neurotransmitter are energetic and restless, like novelty and enjoy taking risks. Serotonin is associated with mood, and people whose brain chemistry is dominated by this neurotransmitter are calm and controlled, like structure and are risk adverse. Estrogen and testosterone are, of course, the sex hormones responsible for male and female traits. People whose systems are dominated by testosterone are analytical and emotionally contained, competitive and bold. Finally, people whose systems are dominated by estrogen are empathic and emotionally expressive, flexible and agreeable. Fisher claims that her studies show that matches between people with certain brain systems yield the best results, in particular, serotonin people are best matched with other serotonin people, dopamine is best matched with dopamine, and testosterone is best matched with estrogen. Serotonin and dopamine are best matched within their own systems because they share the same values, serotonin for stability and dopamine for adventure. Dopamine people appear to be happiest when they can move from relationship to relationship--ie, serial monogamy--while serotonin people are happiest in stable, long-term relationships.

That's Fisher's work. To extend it to MBTI, I matched each chemical to a form of cognition. Dopamine I assigned to extroverted perception, serotonin to introverted perception, estrogen to feeling, and testosterone to thinking. It follows that the types are matched EXXP to EXXP, IXXJ to IXXJ, and F-dom to T-dom. Each type, then, is matched to four other types. For example, INTP would be matched to INFP, ESFJ, ENFJ, and ISFP. Notice that this includes both Keirsey's match, ENFJ, and socionics' dual, ESFJ. This will be the case for each type in the T-F pairing. It will not be the case for the dopamine and serotonin pairings since in both Keirsey and socionics these two groups are matched to each other on the basis that opposites attract. In Fisher's system, however, dopamine and serotonin are too different to be good long-term matches.

Finally, we can reduce the possible matches to a single best pairing by matching auxiliary functions using the same methodology. So, Ti-Ne, for example, would be matched to Fi-Ne (or INFP) since both share aux Ne, or dopamine. Doing this now for each type we get the following results:

INTP-INFP
INFP-INTP
ISTP-ISFP
ISFP-ISTP
ENTJ-ENFJ
ENFJ-ENTJ
ESTJ-ESFJ
ESFJ-ESTJ
ENTP-ENFP
ENFP-ENTP
ESTP-ESFP
ESFP-ESTP
INTJ-INFJ
INFJ-INTJ
ISTJ-ISFJ
ISFJ-ISTJ

I can't speak for all of these matches, but I can say that, judging by the "INTP appreciation' threads I've seen elsewhere, INFPs appear to like and have good relations with INTPs, and vice versa, not least because the two types are similar in many ways. Since each type also shares many similarities with its partner, I imagine every type has much the same appreciation for its partner as INTPs and INFPs have for each other. So, on its face, these pairings appear to be workable. Furthermore, the basis for these matches is founded on actual research. The research may prove to be wrong, but at least there is some empirical evidence supporting these results, unlike Kiersey and socionics that are based solely on theory and speculation.

Comments? What do you think of the pairing for your type?


PS Here is another video by Fisher giving a fuller explanation of her ideas.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qv-Jja4 ... 0wuVs1StmU

cc1212
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Joined: Thu Dec 18, 2014 1:03 pm
MBTI type: INFP
Gender (M or F): F

Re: A theory of type matching in romantic relationships

Post by cc1212 » Fri Dec 19, 2014 12:55 pm

Thank you for sharing your post; I found it quite fascinating. I can't answer your question about the "matching" since I haven't known the MB types that I have been in relationships with. I enjoyed learning what you have shared. Thanks! :D

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